My name is James and I’m 34 years old. I have Cerebral Palsy which affects the use of all four of my limbs.

I face barriers on a day to day basis due to my condition. Small physical tasks can be very difficult for me. Things as simple as picking things up when I drop them and grabbing something off the shelf when I’m shopping are hard for me to do myself. I have a lot of metal in my pelvis and hips due to the operations I’ve had over the years, so even small movements on bad days can be uncomfortable. Moving too often can also cause me muscle spasms, which makes everyday tasks really difficult for me.

The difficulties that I faced on a day to day basis also took a toll on my mental health. I was very anxious about a lot of things, particularly about going out anywhere on my own. I would talk myself out of doing anything independently because of what I thought might go wrong, and ended up isolating myself completely.

I originally applied for a canine partner when I moved into my current house, many years ago. Even then, I talked myself out of it because of my anxieties, telling myself that I wouldn’t be accepted, that I wouldn’t be able to look after a dog. I’m someone who’s scared of failure, which stops me from taking things on a lot of the time. A few years went by, and in around 2014, I saw another canine partner when I was in town with one of my carers. It was around about the time that the council cut my care hours, which was really difficult, as I didn’t want to go out on my own.

I spoke with the person who had the canine partner, and told them about how I had almost applied before and stopped myself, and they told me I had to go through with it after I explained a bit about my situation. Eventually, I got round to applying, and soon after I received a letter telling me I’d been accepted onto the next step towards getting a canine partner.

I then went to the charity’s Midlands Training Centre to do some assessments. Even then, I was telling myself that I’d never be able to do what was required to have a dog, but I kept going and eventually got to the day where I was meeting Megan for the first time.

Meeting Megan

She came into the room and looked at me, with eyes like butter wouldn’t melt! She looks at me even now like I’m the best thing in the world, and she did that the first time she saw me. I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve that, but it’s a beautiful feeling every time she does. The residential training was difficult, and was a constant battle of fighting with my own lack of confidence. But the whole time, Megan just wanted to help me and do my tasks, which is still the same to this day. What might be a boring task for me is a fun game to her, and she just loves helping me out whenever she can.

“I used to be worried about every day before it would even arrive. Now I know that whatever comes, Meg and I will deal with it together.”

Megan offers a lot of help with the small physical tasks that are a lot of effort for me to do myself. She’ll take my jumper off, pick things up off the floor, get things off of the shelf, collect the mail and bring it back to me. The discomfort I feel when moving to do different everyday tasks like these is greatly reduced due to Megan doing those movements for me, and it makes my life much easier every day.

Socially, my life is very different. Before I had Megan, I felt as if people wouldn’t look at me twice, but now, people will always come up to us and chat about Megan and what she can do. At the best of times I’m a naturally unsociable person, but having Megan beside me just seems to put me in situations where I talk to so many more people, and I know I’m better off for it. It’s helped me build connections, a wider support network for myself, and it’s all because Megan starts these conversations and in her own amazing way.

During the Covid-19 lockdowns, for example, people were bringing me food and supplies for myself and Megan. Without her, I wouldn’t have built those connections and probably wouldn’t have that support. I just didn’t have the confidence to talk to people before Megan. She’s the best conversation starter there is.

Having to walk Megan means I generally get out of the house more, which is great for my mental health. I’ve been places that I would never have been comfortable with. I’ve been to shows and gigs which I would never have done previously. All of this widens my circles socially, and none of that would’ve happened before Megan came into my life.

Big changes

They might be small changes to some people, but for me they’re huge, and having the freedom to do these things independently, even something as simple as going into the local café for breakfast after walking Megan, has made a huge difference to my life. Recently, I took Megan for a walk and it started to rain. I thought I was going to get soaked, so I went under a tree with Megan and ended up sitting there for about half an hour. Even then, I felt grateful for being out in the world, and that before Megan, I wouldn’t be out here at all. It’s made me appreciate the small things in life in a way I couldn’t before.

Becoming a pair

People say to me now that I seem much less anxious and worried about things than I was, which is definitely true. Although I don’t live close to my family, they know the effect that Megan has had on me, physically and mentally. My mum passed away in December 2020, and she used to say before she passed away, that every other sentence I would mention Megan. That’s how intertwined with your life they become as your canine partner. There’s no separating us, we come as a pair! Before my mum died, she said to me that she knew I’d be okay because I had Megan and it was a relief to know that she didn’t worry about me before she passed.

I used to be worried about every day before it would even arrive. Now I know that whatever comes, Megan and I will deal with it together. I draw a lot of strength from her, and sometimes she doesn’t even have to do anything, but the simple fact she’s there gives me enough of a boost to get through the day. I take each day as it comes, and having Megan by my side makes that even easier. From the connections that I’ve built and social circles that have opened up, I do feel like I have a positive future, and that’s because of Megan. Before Megan retires, I want to go on holiday, which is something I haven’t done in 15 years of living here. The fact that I can look ahead to this sort of thing is something that I wouldn’t have even contemplated before!

It’s probably fair to say that I was a glass half empty kind of guy, but with Megan by my side, the glass is looking much fuller.